Holiday

I've got a 2 weeks plus holidays ahead of me and I don't feel excited or happy at all.

It's because I gotta study for my first ACCA exam, P1 paper to be exact.

Damn when can I go for a holiday? Maybe I'll go for a holiday tonight when I am dreaming...

Well, happy study for those who are taking exams, ACCA, CPA, MICPA, CIM, CIMA, STPM, SPM, PMR, UPSR or whatever...

All the best! (Including me)

Auditor vs Prostitutes

I work as an external auditor and one day I received an e-mail from one of my colleagues on how auditors work like prostitutes.

The truth about being an auditor:

1. You work very late = just like a prostitute.

2. They pay you to make the client happy = just like a prostitute.

3. The client pays a lot of money, but your employer keeps almost every cent = just like a prostitute.

4. You are rewarded for fulfilling the client's dreams = just like a prostitute.

5. Your friendships fall apart and you end up hanging out with people in the same profession as you = just like a prostitute.

6. When you have to meet the client you always have to be perfectly groomed = just like a prostitute.

7. But when you go back home it seems like you are coming back from hell = just like a prostitute.

8. The client always wants to pay less but expects incredible things from you = just like a prostitute.

9. When people ask about your job, you have difficulties to explain it = just like a prostitute.

10. Everyday when you wake up, you say: "I'm not going to spend the rest of my life doing this." = just like a prostitute.


Damn... suddenly I feel like a prostitute, except that I get to keep my clothes on when I start working.

A funny news

This news maybe old but I think it will remain as an all-time classic in the history of mankind.

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Singapore (May 4, 2009) : A secretary bit off the private parts of her boss in a freak accident during their sex romp in a car.

The incident happened in a car park in East Coast Park in Singapore over the weekend.

According to a Singapore evening paper's report, which was picked up by the Malaysian Chinese dailies today, the 30-year-old married woman was performing oral sex on the man when a van reversed into their car, causing her to snap her jaws shut.

What happened not only shocked the couple but also her husband, who after being tipped off by a private eye had rushed to the scene, and was about to pounce on the pair when the accident happened.

The private eye called an ambulance to send the courting couple to hospital.

The woman's insurance agent husband, also 30, had hired the private eye after some intimate SMSes sent to her handphones raised his suspicion.

The private eye, telling the paper what he saw was the most horrible scene in his entire career, said the fuming husband now wanted to divorce his wife.

The report did not say whether doctors managed to reattach the severed penis.

============================================================================

Ouch... I hope doctors in Singapore are professional enough to reattach that man's penis.

So what is the moral of the story?

The moral of the story is that ALWAYS find an empty car park if you were to perform oral sex in a car. Lol.

Kuala Perlis sunset view

Presenting, Kuala Perlis sunset view.


Damn I miss Perlis so much, but no time to go back...

The most beautiful car in the whole world (as at posting date)

For me, this is the mot beautiful car in the whole world to date.


Check out the curvy body of the car.


It's an Alfa Romeo 8C Competizione. With a 4.7 litre V8 under its hood producing 450hp@7,000rpm, it may not be the fastest car in the world but the design of the car is simple yet beautiful.


No fancy spoilers which spoils the car's looks and no stupid paintwork.



I am not from an art background but this car is like a piece of art to me. Some say it's ugly but I don't care, different people different opinion one ma...

The best place to be if you are stuck in a traffic jam

As if the normal version of this car isn't enough, Alfa Romeo damn kuai lan introduced a convertible version of the car. It makes me want this car so badly.

I know it's not achievable for me at this moment as I am just a little humble employee who earn RM2.50 per month, so I better go buy more Toto so that I can strike the lottery before this limited edition car is fully sold out, Alfa Romeo damn lan si will only produces 500 of this beauty.

How to save money at Pizza Hut

I got these photos from the internet. I have no idea who did this but I am sure that if every single customer of Pizza Hut did it, Pizza Hut will gone bankrupt within months.

Remember the salad in Pizza Hut where everyone will try their best to fill the small bowls with as full as possible?

Well, this one is the “master” of Pizza Hut salad.

These pictures actually teach us how to make every cent counts when ordering salad.

Their first masterpiece - named Christmas Tree

Their second masterpiece - The cucumber Tree

If you dare to do this in front of everyone then I think the waiter will not stop you.

Kuala Selangor Fireflies

Situated more than 60km away from KL city, Kuala Selangor is famous for its seafood and one of the most special tourist attraction in Malaysia, Kampung Kuantan.

What makes Kampung Kuantan so special is not some fancy theme parks or huge shopping malls, it's because of fireflies, lots of fireflies.


At first I don't understand why so many people traveled from different places just to see fireflies, it's just an insect with a glowing ass. People told me that it'll be a nice scene in the night with lots of glowing fireflies, so being curious I went to the place and try to figure out why people wanted to see fireflies' glow-in-the-dark asses so much.


The Kampung Kuantan is actually a small jetty beside a mangrove swamps which is categorized as a forest reserve by the government.



I think the place is sponsored or supported by Tenaga Nasional Berhad because upon entrance there were many signboards with the company's logo on it.


A RM10 ticket entitle you for a boat ride around the swamps in the night to see fireflies. I bought my ticket and line up together with a lot of people.

The line was going forward very very slow as the boats are powered by men with paddles instead of motors, this is to prevent disturbance to the fireflies on the mangrove trees caused by the water waves and sound from the motorboats.


I waited for more than an hour because some Malaysians acted like Malaysians. And Malaysians are notorious for cutting the queue, popular tactics include acting like you know someone in front of the line and cut queue, once they got a spot in front they'll call over all their family members including the grandpas, grandmas, uncles, aunties, brothers, sisters, children, mother in laws, father in laws and many more to join them in front.

And if you ask them properly not to cut queue, the whole family will look at you as if you are some kind of moron from Mars.


While I queue I noticed that there were some signboards warning visitors not to disturb the fireflies by doing something like flashing the torchlights, using flash cameras or catching fireflies.



One particular signboard caught my eyes, written on it was a fine of RM1,000 will be imposed for catching fireflies, the fine is even higher than littering. Looks like the government is serious in protecting this place.

After a long wait I finally got my life jacket and got on the boat, the boat was a small sampan to be precise.


The man maneuvering the boat was actually a fisherman who work in the night for extra income. He controlled the boat quietly through the swamps by using two wood paddles, no loud noise or big waves in the water, really professional, if it was me I would have created a tsunami.

The boat glided smoothly through some of the mangrove trees where lots of fireflies lit up the whole tree like a Christmas tree.

It was a nice scene to behold. The light weren't exactly as bright as light bulbs but in total darkness it's like stars in the night sky.

At first I thought there were only a few trees with fireflies but I was wrong, the entire area was full of fireflies, sometimes you can see some fireflies flying around the trees.

It was really a special scenery, you don't get to see these large amount of fireflies lighting up in other places.

I tried to take some photos (without flash one ok) to share it here but failed because it was too dark.

Nice photos, I know...

I think it's time for me to buy more Toto so that I can win RM1 million and buy a proper SLR camera.